Signs to a Healthy Self-Esteem...

Signs of a healthy self esteem:

has self respect; and requires/inspires it in others; 
is calm; 
is composed; 
doesn't seek others’ approval; 
is capable and disciplined; 
knows what they like and what they don’t like; 
knows what they stand for, and isn’t afraid to take a stand; 
their sense of self is internally motivated and fed, rather than externally; 
is confident, though not arrogant; 
is assertive, though not aggressive;  
is gracious and hospitable, without being insecure or a doormat; 
they know strengths and weaknesses; 
they seek to keep good company, including those of character, integrity and manners; 
they think before the speak and act; 
they ask for help when they need it; 
they offer help when they can give it; 
they do not settle for second rate behaviors and attitudes in self or others; 
they express wants, needs and desires in a healthy fashion; 
they are quick and sincere in their forgiveness of self and others; 
they have or develop a strong work ethic; 
they strive to become a independent and interdependent; 
they set goals for short term and long term accomplishments; 
and they learn to handle both failure and success well. 

And when these attributes/traits are in your life it is not likely that you will end up in destructive cycles that include alcoholism, drug addiction or being with abusive partners...

If you need immediate assistance, dial 911. The National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE.